4-13-2004 No more nightmares on Elm Street?

We didn't have enough people to do the job and we didn't have enough money by magnitudes. When you run out (of money) people die. When people die you get more money.--Cofer Black, former head of the CIA's counterterrorism activities, testifying before the 11/04 Commission today.

From today's Times Leader:

Home upgrade aid sought

W-B seeks grant funds that would go toward exterior improvements in residences near downtown.



WILKES-BARRE - Residents living within half a mile of downtown could soon have access to as much as $2,500 to use toward exterior home improvements.

The money, which can be used for facade upgrades such as new siding or fresh paint, would be available through a $250,000 grant from the state Department of Community and Economic Development's Elm Street project.

On it's face, this may not seem like a big deal, but in actuality, it really is. For starters, the bucks are there for the asking. And secondly, we've got plenty of properties that are screaming out for a bit of a facelift. What this also illustrates is that somebody at City Hall is doing the necessary homework. When Rendell first pushed through some of his spending initiatives, I went to the state's web site and read up on them. The Elm Street Project leaped right out at me as something that we as a city should be participating in like pronto. Lo-and-behold, a week or so later we find out the city is planning to do just that.

No biggie you say? I think it is important. It seems as if the days when childish elected officials picked fights with state officials, opted out of Weed & Seed programs, and called the Governor names are definately behind us. Cooperation, teamwork and fiscal responsiblilty too! Who could have thunk it?

Governor Rendell Signs Elm Street Bill

Elm Street Text File

The illustrious Ethel strikes again:

The PNAC Presents, The Who: Who's Next -- Ethel Hozniak, 21:46:58 04/12/04 Mon [1]

Contrary to popular belief around these parts I do rock out every now and then. Mostly when I get my government check and have a glass of that boxed wine stuff the kids drink now days. I also got a six-pack of that Mark's Hard Lemonade.

So after hitting about half of that box I decided to continue my studies on world hegemony. I'm getting a little too old for studying with a buzz. But what I can take away from all of this is that The Chosen One is right. There, I said it. He is my Allah. My Thompson Street, Zappa, Allah-Dude. Praise Almighty.

It's world hegemony time. The only problem is that there is no end in sight, hence, who's next. The way I see it, Wolfy and Rummy would like to pull Iran into the game and go after a country that could complete the puzzle to the Middle East. Wolfy got those boys in Saudi Arabia under control for now and Kuwait is more Americanized than downtown Wilkes-Barre. There is always that joke of a country, Wild Turkey. Hell, the people vote to keep us off their land as a staging area and that causes a big stir. We'll have to get on those slackers at a later date.

It's just this little Iraq thing that concerns most sane people. It's like those little creatures don't want us there. Don't they know that democracy is the wave of the future.

What happens between now and the election is simple. Dodge, spin, remember the compassionate conservative mantra, round up some cattle on the ranch, throw out a couple of WMD jokes, keep the electorate scared with raised terror threats....of course during the RNC convention, and the greatest stunts of all, have Bush return to an aircraft carrier and say that the end of combat during Round 2 of the Iraq War has been finalized. Rove has this on his refrigerator next to his shopping list. Iran, Syria, North Korea.

As far as coffee with the Chosen One, aka Zappa Bush Dude, I must pass. However, if you like White Zin, I have half a box left. Bring your GWB mug and I'll use my Kerry stein and we'll race. I used to handle lead off in six man (Southern Baptist style) keg stand races so your pansy ass may not be able to keep up.

I leave you all with what the US imperialistic, world domination has brought upon us over the last year. Stand back to get a good view.

A mosaic of soldiers who have died in Iraq


In case anyone is wondering, PNAC is the acronym for "Project for the New American Century," which many hathotic opponents of the president switched to after the AWOL, etc., etc., etc., baseless accusations didn't stick a lick. Now he's being accused of implementing the Neo-Con Master Plan, The Neo-Con Bible if you will, that was written back in the days when the Republicans were being accused of other scandalous atrocities that never stuck either. This is what disgusts me about this party that consists of a widely-varied and loosely-connected coalition of single issue jerkoff groups. The playbook? Another day-another scandal floated for public consumption. Every single day, everything that Dubya does, or says is wrapped in scandalous accusations and the ghosts of presidents that resigned in disgrace are conjured up once again.

The dollar hegemony I wrote about was ensured when Richard Nixon struck a deal with the Saudis in 1974. The U.S. would tolerate OPEC so long as oil sales were driven by dollars only. And make no mistake about it, no matter who becomes president from here on out, that dollar hegemony will be very high on their list of things to protect. It has to be. Let's revisit something Ethel had to say.

It's world hegemony time. The only problem is that there is no end in sight, hence, who's next.

Exactly. There is no end in sight unless we're all willing to see the U.S. become the economic equivalent of a Third World country. And the fact that Dubya might actually be doing something to counter the threat posed by the euro is by no means damning. Any other president faced with this growing challenge to our economic might would have to be doing something to counter it. The question is: What? The euro challenge is an economic war of sorts. Are we to believe that the Europeans would be willing to negotiate away the greatest threat this country has ever faced? Or does the pincer movement to end OPEC as we know it make more sense? With one crushing blow in Iraq, both the terrorists of the world and the OPEC nations could be put in their places rather neatly. But...the spilling of blood is part of that equation.

Ethel, that mosaic made from the faces of our casualties is nifty and all, but if your boy claims the White House next year, with the world being what it is right now, how much ya wanna bet by the end of 2005 we could create a similar mosaic from the faces of the dead that Kerry will be forced to commit to some nonsense somewhere? You seem too bright to believe that Clintonesque bullspit that if we're nice, somehow everyone else will be nice too. If Kerry replaces Bush, the very next day all of the countries of the world, and the terrorists themselves will sign a historic peace treaty and share a few million bottles of Coke while singing and holding hands? Who's next? I guess that depends on a few variables. But it seems increasingly likely that we'll be deploying our forces abroad for the foreseeable future.

I gotta tell ya though, if there is a shopping list; Iran, Syria, and North Korea sounds just about right. I know it had to be painful to admit that I was right about something, but that happens very infrequently. You're probably safe for spell. What the hell is White Zin anyway? And no, I don't own a GWB mug, but I do have a snazzy McG mug. I also see you couldn't help yourself. Now, I'm a "pansy ass." I'm a pansy ass with a grossly undersized and mutated member that even my hopelessly perverted gardener won't touch. Are you related to Al Franken?

From the e-mail inbox:


On Saturday, April 24th the Parsons Lions Club is going to be cleaning up the Boulevard median from Conningham Ave. to Washington Street. They will also be doing be doing their annual cleanup of the on and off ramps of the Cross Valley on the Boulevard. They will be meeting at 8 a.m. Just wanted you to know so your gang could concentrate on other areas.


The Parsons Crime Watch will be holding a cleanup, Earth Day, April 24th at 10 a.m.
Volunteers of all ages will be greatly appreciated.
The group will meet on the corner of Parkin St. and George Ave. Scouten Lee Park, Scott St. Park, George Ave. and the Area behind Circuit City on Scott. St. will be the areas cleaned. Soft drinks and water will be supplied, bring your own gloves. Have pride in your community, come lend a hand.

PS. XXX XXX XXX is the President of the Lions club... we will be tired that night.

We will need a few brewskis !*******

Brewskis. There ya go. Let's skip this volunteering stuff and head directly to The North End Tavern. Woo! Hoo!

Another e-mail:

*******what time of the morning we looking at on the 24th.*******

And another:

*******sounds good, how do you like your coffee?*******

Yet another:

*******I'll be there from about 8:00 - 10:00 since I have another cleanup starting at 10:00. I'm not so sure I can recruit others though since they are a part of the 10:00 cleanup.*******

Yo, kiddies. We all need some more hands on the 24th. We need more manpower. Consider joining us if it's at all possible. We are going to start making some noticeable differences in this city and it's way overdue as far as I'm concerned. Ethel? You in? Put an end to the cyber-balkanization and join me.

If you attend one of those Pioneers indoor football games keep your eyes open. It seems our former mayor finally went and got himself hired somewhere. And he's still biting people's heads off.

Crockett & Brianna?

And finally, there's this just in to the e-mail inbox:


You're on for RiverFest 2004! The front seat of my kayak is reserved for you and - if he's ready - the middle seat will be primed and ready for the GageMeister. I've been asked to be part of the river rescue crew...so we'll be on watch for anyone who decides to go for a swim without their boat. If that happens, we'll take their picture and have it posted on some website for all to see just before we rescue them.

Anyway, looking forward to our third straight year on the river. More in a few weeks.


Kayak Dude*******

Dude, you can count us in. This will be Gage's very first big, big adventure. And I'll be sure to put new batteries in the camera for when the newbies go splash.

Anyone else want in? RIVERFEST 2004: Do it, you'll love it.

One more thing. Name an automobile that was named after a cow.

No! I'm not screwing around.