7-1-2004 R.I.P. HP

I felt better after I said it. A lot of my colleagues felt what I said badly needed to be said.--Dick Cheney to a Fox News Channel reporter after he launched an F-bomb in Vermont Senator Patrick Leahy's general direction.

When I first read about Cheney going "F-zone" on Leahy, I was mildly amused. Consider the intended target and you should be able to figure out why? Leahy is basically a vitriolic, small-time wallydraigle from a state that has a population barely larger than Luzerne County's. I hate to paint with too broad of a broad brush, but I tend to discount the opinions of folks from states that are barely larger than upper Noxen. Patrick Leahy? If we need to weaponize maple syrup anytime soon, we'll give you a buzz. Tom Daschle? When snow removal becomes a pressing national issue, we'll be sure to remember you're still alive and still towing the socialist line. Maybe.

Am I condoning the use of an F-bomb by the man one seat away from near total control of half of the world's A-bombs? Normally, I would have to say no, but in this case, I can understand the use of this offensive word too shocking for politics, but readily used in every other aspect of American life. For months now, Bush and Cheney have been called every name in the book and accused of everything short of the murder of Laci Petersen by their obviously aroused, but still agenda-less opponents. After months of non-stop, unsubstantiated accusations, and being called liars, murderers, cheaters, and clueless; it was probably way overdue for someone to respond with a hearty f**k-off!

On WILK, Nancy & Kev were wondering if those who took such great offense to John Kerry having used the forbidden word in an interview would have the same reaction to Cheney having used it. They pointed out that Rush Limbaugh took to calling Kerry "John F-ing Kerry" after that less than readable interview he gave. Would the dyed-in-the-wool Republicans react the same way after someone narced on Cheney? Hint, hint. Cheney never used that word in an interview. The sad fact is, John F. Kerry used to be known as John Kerry. Once he decided to seek an even higher office, he suddenly became John F. Kerry. And Rush rightfully had some fun with that. Imagine some boob actually believing that having the same initials as J.F.K. would make him more electable. Much like the Dems ridiculous belief that if they can somehow prove that some terrorists really were abused by our troops, the American public would even raise an eyebrow for the most part.

Then Kerry decided to sit for a Rolling Stone interview and chose to say that Bush "fu**ed-up Iraq." Hence, the John "F-ing" Kerry moniker. Again, he earned the snickers, and again he proved that he's a boob. He used that word on purpose so as to appear to be hip, or cool to the readers of Rolling Stone. Sadly, Rolling Stone hasn't been hip, or cool since Donovan was still charting on Billboard. If the now-defunct Tiger Beat magazine had interviewed him, he'd probably say that "Bush's vision for Iraq isn't groovy." He's an F-ing boob. How about an interview on MTV? "Bush is a fat and nasty mofo, yo?"

Kerry reminds me of Al Gore, that sad little caricature of a man, the former Alpha-Male, that has ignored that unwritten rule about not speaking out against his successors at the very top of the political food chain. Depending on the venue, his message, his demeanor, and his candor are instantly and magically adjusted to supply what he perceives that any given audience wants to hear. And while the party consisting of mostly single-issue voters has treated us to nothing but the Tora! Tora! Tora! playbook for months on end and gained absolutely nothing in the polls, the F-bomb was probably long overdue.

If I wandered into a whorehouse (more likely a bathhouse) in any of our larger cities and ran into any of the vacuous pitbulls currently dominating the rapidly-slipping Democratic party; "F**k-off" would quickly shoot to the tip of my tongue. And as evidenced by the recent Senate floor encounter, the vapid pitbull I offended would likely run screaming foul to the nearest reporter. When a fellow Dem talks to interviewers much like a crack whore would it's no big deal. But have someone in the opposite camp let loose just once and we might need yet another commission to get to the bottom of F-gate.

From Salon.com:

June 27, 2004 | WASHINGTON (AP) -- Majority Leader Bill Frist refused on Sunday to criticize Vice President Dick Cheney for cursing on the floor of the Senate in a confrontation with a Democratic senator.

The Tennessee Republican indicated that Cheney's outburst at Sen. Patrick Leahy, D-Vt., can be attributed to political passions aroused by the election year. As vice president, Cheney acts as president of the Senate, although the majority leader has more authority over the body's operations.

Those damn Republicans! Oh, how they stick together. Yeah, and oral sex isn't sex at all. What does "is" mean anyway?

I've been...

...laying low and nursing my wounds for the past few days. It's been busy at work and I suffered through one particularly physical job that I suspect turned my left upper leg into one large blood clot. There is not a single centimeter of that leg that doesn't hurt even to the slightest touch and yet, not even a hint of a black-and-blue mark. I believe I told ya'll about the benefits of eucalyptus a while back. It prevents muscle bruising and facilitates muscle healing. Try it, you'll like it. That's assuming you do anything more athletic than lifting the remote.

I read...

...the Sunday Party Animals column and I'm wondering if anyone suspects that POWER! either paid, or coerced a certain city council type into throwing that charity softball game. 3 straight walks on 12 straight balls, and then a dead red pitch begging to be converted into a grand slam? Should I call SAYSO? Shoeless Jim McCarthy?

I'm not 100% sure...

...if the following e-mail was meant for public consumption, but I feel that it's important that the big whigs know what the underlings think of their decisions and the processes that led to those decisions. I have never once bit my lip when asked by any boss of mine what I thought of the latest decisions to come down the corporate pike. All too often, I found myself being chastised for my frank opinions, but no one ever sought to run me out of any private sector enterprise for not towing the latest company line.

Maybe that's part of why I just can't appreciate people posting anonymously while tearing our politicos a new one. A voice, an opinion without a name and a face amounts to less than what our former mayor accomplished. Consider his last attempt at being reelected and all of the folks that passionately spoke out against such a thing. If those widely-varied folks took the safe route and called SAYSO, today's headlines would probably have to do with Act 47, or state investigators issuing subpoenas to city officials.

And if city employees have something to say, they should stand tall and let it rip free from any fear of retribution from City Hall. The dude that sent this e-mail my way also posted on the forum last week and immediately raised my eyebrows. I'm sure he raised a few others as well. I did not wholeheartedly agree with his comments, but I sure as hell respect the fact that he had the courage to post them while many of his co-workers were clinging to their anonymity. By clinging to said anonymity, some of us are clearly exposing the fact that we are afraid of the folks we voted for. That needs to come to an end.

Since I'm not positive that he wanted these comments posted, I took it upon myself to delete one of the names he mentioned. That's not necessarily a bad thing. Look at all the fun some of us can have speculating about who it was he was referring to. Anywho...


no offense taken. I always enjoy reading your thoughts and am thankful that you had the forethought to provide a forum for mine. Differing opinions are the gem that makes this country shine and can only help broaden the the next guy's understanding of a given situation.

Unlike a number of my brethren, I'm not ready to surrender my faith in the mayor or the fire chief. It's just too early to make any judgment as to the fitness of either. And yeah, we all know the city is going broke. But I do take issue with the people who are giving the mayor the bad information that has lead to our current situation. No need to name names. And I know that all decisions made at the mayoral level have to be made based on personal insight combined with the recommendations made by his "cabinet" (for lack of a better term).

These folks a quite adept at driving wedges rather than building bridges which is why the previous mayor was able to do so much damage in such a short period of time (as it relates to union enterprise). And now a new wedge has been set, the first hammer blows have fallen. I fear we may be heading towards another uncomfortable four years for no good reason. My hope is that the mayor will study the the behavior and history related to the inner circle and realize that their toolage has bred a distrust of all things coming out of city hall. Though I'm still gambling on my belief that Tom Leighton is a better man than we are accustomed to and that a workable, sensible plan can be formulated to benefit the public good (financially) and and firefighter/public safety. Let's keep our fingers crossed.


Side note: XXXXXXXX: Where the hell did we find this clown?

P.S.: Got Rhino's box set "No Thanks!" The `70s Punk Rebellion. Excellent!*******

So you're cautiously optimistic, but still somewhat skeptical? I think the folks pulling the city's strings should be able to live with that for now. Christ! The Sunday Times Leader story about home rule was basically asking the voters of this county to make a final decision about the competence, or lack thereof, of our new majority county commissioners after only six months in office. While you may be seen as brazen by some for your internet comments, at least you still hold out some hope for a better Wilkes-Barre. If everyone with a stake in this city's future would simply speak up, posting one's opinion on the internet wouldn't even get noticed. Heyna, or no?

And in no way would I ever tolerate any sort of political backlash against any '70s punk rock fan.

Back in the garage with my bullshit detector
Carbon monoxide making sure it's effective
People ringing up making offers for my life
But I just wanna stay in the garage all night

We're a garage band
We come from garageland

Meanwhile things are hotting up in the West End alright
Contracts in the offices, groups in the night
My bummin' slummin' friends have all got new boots
An' someone just asked me if the group would wear suits

I don't wanna hear about what the rich are doing
I don't wanna go to where the rich are going
They think they're so clever, they think they're so right
But the truth is only known by guttersnipes

There's twenty-two singers! But one microphone
Back in the garage
There's five guitar players! But one guitar
Back in the garage
Complaints! Complaints! Wot an old bag
Back in the garage
All night

I can speak for myself and I can speak for the President, and I can assure you that neither of us have seen 'Fahrenheit'. We don't have a lot of free time these days and when we do have free time to see a good fiction movie, we'll pick 'Shrek' or some other enjoy[able] feature like that.

Mr. Moore has every right to produce and show movies that express his very radical views. He's outside of the mainstream. ... This is a film that doesn't require us to actually view it to know it's filled with factual inaccuracies.--White House Communications Director Dan Bartlett

The latest...

...from Thompson Street. After having drug dealers calling this tiny street home for a fortnight or so, most of it's longtime occupants have been rightfully nervous as the numerous "For Sale" signs began to dominate our miniscule landscape. But...so far, so good. Three for three, from what I can tell. One home was bought by some young guy who mostly sticks to himself. The next was bought by a young, professional couple. The latest adobe was snatched by an even younger looking couple and they haven't generated any police calls yet. I guess we had better warn them about what is going to happen on August 21st.

In case you missed it...

...I posted on the forum page last night in an attempt to explain my being AWOL as of late. My Hewlett Packard joined his dead relatives late Sunday afternoon. I have no intention of rushing off to buy a replacement. All in good time, my friends. For the time being, I'll be stalking the web by way of my Web TV Plus unit. By the way, my temporary e-mail address is corzong@webtv.net. Feel free to insult me. It makes my day on most days.

And what...

...in the muck is up with the most recent forum post? What is that now? Dear McAbby meets the National Enquirer??? Holy jumpin' orangutan farts, Batman! Who's bangin' who? As if I really care.

Ah shucks, let's have at it. Rumor has it that a high ranking member of the city's administration is having at it real grotesque like with the city gardener's teen-aged helper. It is also this reporter's opinion that they may have had a bit of the old in/out, in/out while city workers cheered them on, and on city property no less.

Tillie and Francis won't dare touch this story, but Mike McGlynn will probably offer us "proof" that it is the result of some Bush policy gone horribly wrong. As in, every Bush policy has gone horribly wrong to listen to Mikey spew it.


...Polish troops in Iraq have uncovered some shells containing Sarin gas and whatnot. How could that be? I thought there were absolutely no WMDs in Iraq? Right? Bush lied? 'Member that bullspit? I warned ya' not to stupidly repeat whatever those chuckleheads on the video advertising box tried to beat into your heads. I warned ya. I funkin' warned ya. That reminds me. Whatever happened to the "War for Oil?" That went the way of the dinosaurs lickety-split, d'int it? Or how about the oil pipeline across Afghanistan? Yeah, that made about as much sense as anal sex, but that didn't stop the dummies among us from repeating it.

Face it, if you're gonna run around calling your president all sorts of vile names based on what Ted Kennedy, Hillary Clinton, or Michael Moore have to say; you're a myrmidon not capable of independent thought. Be careful what accusations you toss out there, they might come back to make you sound stupid. Or already did.

Speaking of Michael Moore, I heard the most flabbergasting and irresponsible statement on WILK a couple of days back. Kevin Lynn said he didn't have a problem with Michael Moores having taken liberties with the truth in his movie with the ripped-off title. Imagine that. Kev gave the movie an A-plus despite being factually challenged to the point of being irrelevant. So much for Kev seeking truths.

You know, Michael Moore makes John Candy look like a jock at the absolute apex of his athletic prowess. And we all know what happened to Candy. Cross your fingers.

I gotta go. I have not had a single beer since Sunday. It's time to reverse that troubling trend.